I'm going BANANAS! <--See what I did there?

I attempted to trim our banana tree today.  I've been wanting to do it for awhile now b/c ever since the cold weather hit, it has looked like this:

Actually, it ended up looking worse than this as all the green eventually turned brown.

It used to look like this:

Anyway, I finally bought some clippers, and I was going to trim it until it looked good.  There have been some green leaves sprouting out of it lately, and I thought I'd be able to trim everything but those.

However, I never took into consideration that a banana tree is totally disgusting.  It was all wet on the inside, and as soon as I started cutting, it stunk!  Like rotten fruit and eggs, and UGH!  I couldn't stand it.  I also heard that spiders like to breed in banana trees, so the whole time I'm cutting, I keep picturing millions of baby spiders climbing out of the stems after I cut them.  After a few cuts of nasty branches and an overwhelming smell of rottenness, I called Andrew to ask him if we had a saw.

"Uh, why do you need a saw?"
"I'm going to cut this stupid banana tree down! *insert rant about smell and spiders*"
"Wait, wait, you just let me take care of it..."

He has a soft spot for the banana tree.

I've read online that you can cut them down, and they'll grow back.  I've read it multiple times on different sites, so I think we'll be okay here.  I mean, I like the novelty of having a banana tree, but I don't like the spiders nor the stinky smell.

On a side note, I detest plants with pokey things like thorns.

I'm hoping that we can tackle this nastrocity this weekend.  I'll keep ya updated.